I think I believe 'em.
Anyway! On to the awesomeness, yes?
Pumpkin Fig Cupcakes
From Southern Living's Big Book of Cupcakes, the "Pumpkin Patch" recipe, with some very slight modifications
1 ½ c butter, softened
2 ½ c sugar
5 large eggs
1 c canned pumpkin
1 ¾ c all-purpose flour (the original recipe calls for soft wheat, which, pfft)
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp pumpkin pie spice
¼ tsp salt
2/3 c buttermilk (I used lowfat since it's all the store had, and it worked out great)
1 tsp vanilla
7-8 fresh figs, medium size, chopped (this was the major modification)
Directions for cupcakes:
1. Preheat oven to 350 F.
2. Beat butter and sugar until creamy, but do not shame them. That's totally crossing the line, yo. Add eggs, one at a time, beating until blended after each addition. Add in pumpkin, beating until blended.
3. Combine dry ingredients; add to butter mixture, alternating with buttermilk (begin and end with flour mixture). Mix until just blended after each addition. Stir in the vanilla and the figs, and do a victory dance because these are going to be awesome.
4. Line muffin pans with paper baking cups and fill each cup 2/3 full with batter.
5. Bake 18-20 minutes or until wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Only stab one cupcake one time; there's no need to treat them like vampires and stake the lot, okay? Cool in pans on wire racks for 10 minutes, then remove from pans and cool completely on wire racks.
6. Taste test one, but I'd let them get cool first. They're very, very moist, and letting them set overnight makes them even more fabulous than nomming them fresh. Their texture is dense and moist, but not in the oh-god-too-much-ugh way. More like the oh-god-this-is-heavenly-I-want-another-one-gimme way. Makes 24 amazing cupcakes.
Honey Cream Cheese Frosting:
8 oz. cream cheese, cold
2-3 Tbs honey
¼ to ½ tsp cinnamon
2 c powdered sugar
Toss all ingredients into a large, high bowl. Beat with hand mixer or in stand mixer until smooth, making sure not to overbeat. If you do go overboard, your frosting will be sadly floofy and runny. Spoon and spread onto cooled cupcakes. If there isn't enough frosting to your liking or, like me, you've "tested" several spoonfuls and thus are a bit short, mix up another batch. Pile higher on cupcakes and eat the leftovers with a spoon. Try not to drool on yourself; it's unattractive. Om nom nom!